Thank you, we're very proud of him.

Being the betrothed of a military man is an odd experience for me. Not only do I have to navigate my ambivalence toward the military writ large, the war in Iraq in particular, and the prospect of moving every three years until he retires, I have to figure out what to say when people thank me for his service (or sometimes they thank me for my sacrifice). The first time someone said it to me, I had no idea what to say. "Umm, thanks?" was the response, I think. Now that we're marking nearly three weeks of him being in Baghdad, I've figured out what to say, but somehow my ambivalence has grown. The Navy is offering him a TON of money (tax-free!) to re-enlist, and so we, together, decided that it would be for the best for him to re-up for 4 more years. If he makes chief in this enlistment, he says he'll want to stay in until retirement. He'll probably make chief. Who knew when I was a supremely self-confident bleeding heart college student that my future would have a U.S. Military ID card in it? And yet this sailor is the kindest, most considerate, most compassionate man I have ever met. As far as I can tell, his only faults are poor spelling and a tendency to horde stuff. (Of course, any accusations of pack-rat-ism from me would be complete and utter hypocrisy, so perhaps I should strike that last.)

Last night I was looking on cafe press for a holiday card we could send. On a whim I searched for "Navy," and I found a ton of tee-shirt designs for Navy wives & girlfriends. One said "Navy Wife: You try doing this shit." For some reason, knowing that there are enough other people in my shoes to warrant a tee-shirt made me feel better. It's been less than 3 weeks since he deployed, and I'm having a hard time making the bed every day. If it weren't for the dog needing to go out, I wonder if I'd leave the house on the weekends. (Work has been really shitty lately, too, but perhaps it's best to save that for another post.)

I'm not sure why I'm posting this, except to tell those few of you who read: next time you meet a service person, or especially their spouse, take a second to thank them. It doesn't matter what your politics are. My military man dislikes the current administration as much as that self-confident bleeding heart student I once was. Even if he didn't, as long as people like him continue to volunteer for this shitty existence, the rest of us aren't forced to do it.